Mother’s
Day has come and gone, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t still celebrate our
mothers, especially mine because she is the bomb diggity and the best mother
ever…just saying.
We all know
they totally deserve all the love, attention and praise they receive on their
special day, just alone for all the crap we put them through and for the fact
that they haven’t killed us as a result of it.
With that
said, we shouldn’t limit our appreciation of them to only one day because they
deserve way much more than that, probably way more than we will ever be able to
repay.
All mothers
aren’t the same (I know I was just as
shocked as you when I first learned this), you may find this hard to
believe considering they all share the same name (which is “mom” of course), but they are all unique and wonderful in
their own right.
I wanted to
share a little bit about my mother with all of you wild and crazy internet
folks, that way you could better understand why I am the way I am, and know exactly
who to blame when I get out of hand and start causing a ruckus.
Okay, here goes…
M is for Majesty, because that is exactly how she
handles herself, with such grace and class.
England may
have its queen, but in all honesty, she is nothing more than a mere peasant
compared to my dear mum.
She is our Elizabeth
Taylor, minus a few ex-husbands of course.
O is for Outstanding, because that is exactly what she
is.
She is one
in a million, a diamond in the rough, a beautiful heart in our otherwise dark
and dreary world.
She will do
anything for anyone; no questions asked and without an extended hand looking
for something in return.
T is for Thug, because she may look all sweet and
innocent on the outside, but on the inside she has the spirit of a straight up
gangsta.
To paraphrase
the great poet Charlie Sheen, “She’s different. She has a different
constitution, she has a different brain, and she has a different heart. She’s
got tiger blood, man”. Winning!
She has
knocked out more scrubs than Mike Tyson did in his heyday, and not just with
her fists either; I’ve witnessed her putting punks down for a nap with things like
cast iron skillets, something you would see right out of a Looney Tunes cartoon.
I don’t
want you to think that she just went around attacking random individuals like some crazed maniac, because that’s not the case, all of her opponents
had it coming, let’s just say they were all members of the “Ray Rice fan club”
if you catch my drift.
There’s no doubt in my mind that the woman can hold her own, float like a butterfly, sting like a bee and cook her ass off like nobody's business...ee.
H is for Humor, because she is one of the funniest
mutha fuggers around.
Forget
Kevin Hart, Dane Cook and Amy Schumer, my mother will leave you in stitches and
wetting your pants like a newborn baby.
Please
don’t fall, slip or trip in her presence, because she will laugh uncontrollably
like a mad hyena on crack.
I must
admit though, it does make the whole experience a lot less uncomfortable and
more entertaining for all those involved.
Yo' mama
jokes, no problem, she can get down and dirty with the best of them.
E is for Exceptional, because in a time full of such
hate, anger and destruction, a beacon of light, hope and love.
She is a
shining example of what we as individuals should strive to be, a magnificent representation
of what God had in mind when he created us, a pure blessing for sure.
Full of
warmth and affection which she openly shares with any and everyone who she
comes in contact with.
Makes a
stranger feel so welcome that they forget they just met her and haven’t known
her for many years.
R is for Righteous, because she is someone who would never
intentionally mislead and/or misuse anyone.
Her actions
and deeds are out of genuine love and concern for her fellow people, not one of
self-bias and/or selfish gain.
Someone you
can always depend on, undoubtedly trust and will do everything in her power to
put (and keep) a smile on your face.
Well there you have it my friends, a
rare glimpse into who my mother is.
Remember;
don’t wait for a particular day/occasion to show your mothers just how much
they mean to you, because if you do you may just end up with a lost opportunity
and lots of unfortunate regrets.
Love you mom.
I can now understand where you get some of your qualities from, Mike.
ReplyDeleteA great tribute to your mom.
Thank you very much my friend, I really appreciate that.
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ReplyDeleteAw! So sweet of you to write this for your mom! And of COURSE she's funny - you had to have gotten it from somewhere!
ReplyDeleteThank you, and yes you are correct, I definitely get my sense of humor from her.
DeleteI think our mums deserve to be loved and honored every day! they are the most important and close people in our lives, they gave us a birth!
ReplyDeleteThank you very much my friend. Nice sales pitch there.
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